An Artist's Kiss [Dark Desires 4] (Siren Publishing Sensations) Page 9

  This was a hell of a lot more than him just giving her a couple of smacks and a kiss. Okay, maybe it was that but somehow he thought there was something else, something much bigger.

  Pensively he drove home. Walking into the house, he sat on one of the couches in the large reception room that he called his family room. The wall was missing between the rooms so it became a huge extension to his kitchen.

  His mind was in turmoil. He’d gotten what he wanted but at what cost? The phone rang. Ian.

  “Hey, Gabe. Did you take back the sketchbook?”

  “No, she came here this morning.”

  “And?”

  “I don’t know. Something happened but…”

  He heard the frustration in Ian’s voice as he said in resignation, “What the fuck, Gabe? Don’t tell me you went all he-man on her.”

  “Shit, Ian,” Gabriel said self-consciously.

  “Well, did you?” Ian demanded.

  Meekly Gabriel said, “I just told her she’d been naughty and I’d have to punish her. I was just joking, honestly, but the look she gave me… Hell, Ian, she was turned on and she kind of pleaded with me to do something with her eyes and body.”

  “Geez, Gabe, what the fuck did you do?” angrily Ian asked.

  Gabriel felt so guilty as he said, “I might have put her over my knee and smacked her.”

  “Oh fuck!” Gabriel could hear the exasperation in Ian’s voice as he continued, “Why the hell? Please tell me that was all?”

  In for a penny, in for a pound. He answered, “I might have kissed her, too.”

  Gabriel held the phone away from his ear as Ian screamed at him.

  “You fucking idiot! For god’s sake, Gabe, couldn’t you just behave for one fucking minute?”

  Defensively Gabriel tried to put his side to Ian.

  “It just happened. Look, I’m not proud of it in light of what happened but the truth is she enjoyed it. It turned her on as much as it turned me on, she asked for more. But after she freaked out.”

  “Oh wow, why am I not surprised?” Gabriel flinched from the sarcasm in Ian’s voice. “Of course she bloody freaked out. You’d just assaulted her. You’ll be lucky she doesn’t press charges.”

  “She won’t. I went over to her house.”

  “Oh fuck, Gabe. Can’t you ever learn?”

  “It’s okay. We talked a little bit. Not much.” Gabriel had no intention of telling his friend he’d found Isabella so distraught. “She’s actually coming to pose for me tomorrow.”

  “Keep your fucking hands to yourself if that’s the case,” Ian threatened. “You’re treading on dangerous thin ice.”

  “I will. I promised her I will.”

  “Sheesh, Gabe.” Ian sounded so frustrated, so annoyed with Gabriel.

  “Look, I’m sorry but she excites me. I couldn’t help what happened.”

  “You could have, you know. If you used your brain instead of letting your dick talk. You are so fucking lucky. You could be behind bars right this minute!”

  “I know I was wrong. You don’t have to remind me. I know, okay!” Gabriel felt despicable without Ian reinforcing it.

  “I shouldn’t say anything but Erica told me she’s had some major problems with men. She has an ex that physically abused her and ended up being charged. Apparently she’s sworn off men.”

  At that moment Gabriel felt his gut twist. “Oh fuck!”

  He’d just added to her delightful experiences with abusive men. He was a fucking arsehole!

  “Exactly.” Sarcastically Ian added, “And now she’s just had a wonderful introduction to the great Gabriel Milford.”

  Gabriel shouted, “Okay, don’t rub it in!”

  More upset now, Gabriel felt as if he’d ruined any chance of being with Isabella. Now he knew Isabella’s previous relationships had been so bad that she’d sworn off men made him feel so small. That was obviously why she reacted the way she did. Amazingly she’d given him a second chance and he’d be on his best behaviour from now on.

  “I’m going. Just wake up to yourself, Gabe. You can’t have everything you want in life,” Ian chastised him with his harsh words.

  “Yeah, I hear you.”

  He hung up, feeling dejected.

  The next morning Gabriel wondered if Isabella would turn up. He paced the studio restlessly. By ten past nine he was sure she’d changed her mind, not that he blamed her. So it really shocked him when she walked in about twenty past nine carrying a tote, her hair in a tight bun at the back of her head.

  “Hello. I thought you may have decided not to come.”

  “I considered it,” she said frankly.

  “I wouldn’t have blamed you if you didn’t come but I’m glad you’re here.”

  She gave a half-hearted smile. He pointed to a dais with a long chaise couch. Trying to act very professional, he spoke.

  “I’ve been asked to do a nude female. The exhibition is about the sexual awakened woman and societal attitudes toward sex down the ages. Some of the pieces coming to the exhibition are very old while some are contemporary. I wanted to do something that shows the more open acceptance of kinks with your hands or legs tied or maybe both.”

  She gave him a sudden look of fear.

  “In view of past history between us I think I should revise my plan.”

  “No. No, don’t do that,” she said quickly.

  He cocked his head and looked at her.

  “Are you sure?”

  “Yes. I can handle the pose.”

  “There’s a room behind that screen where you can change, there’s a tiny wash room there as well.”

  She didn’t answer, just nodded and walked off. A few minutes later she came out wearing a Japanese kimono, her arms across her chest. Gabriel had earlier set up a stool for himself and had his paper and charcoals at hand. He walked onto the dais alongside Isabella. There was rope dangling from the exposed beams and he picked up one end.

  Professionally he spoke. “If you could kind of lie on the chaise. Maybe legs on the ground. I want one arm above your head and tied to this rope.”

  As he watched a mask slipped over her face. Gone was the frightened woman and in her place was Issie the professional model. She shucked off her robe and it took all of Gabriel’s strength not to groan aloud. Those lush curves called to him. He wanted to run his hands up and down her body, caress those heavy yet firm breasts. The nest of red hair between her legs had his mouth watering.

  Oh fuck, she’s absolutely gorgeous!

  As he watched she sank gracefully onto the lounge. He could see how comfortable she was with her body as she settled. He picked up her right hand and tied the rope loosely around it.

  “Tell me if it’s too tight. You should be able to wriggle your hand out if you need to,” he asked as he pulled the rope taut.

  She raised her arm as the rope went higher. When Gabriel was satisfied he tied it off.

  “Can you lay one leg on the couch? The right one. Perfect.” He looked at the pose. “Stretch out the left leg. Slightly more to the left. Good. Hold it.”

  Setting the lights to gain the best shadows and highlights, he sat back on the stool and began sketching.

  “Look to the left a little more.”

  The drawings came alive under his hand. He’d give her a direction every now and again. “Eyes down,” “look straight ahead,” “left leg bent,” “can you hold the rope as well?” She obeyed each one without hesitation. His charcoal sped across the paper. Page after page.

  “Gabriel?”

  “Mm.”

  He didn’t bother lifting his head, so wrapped up in the drawings.

  “Gabriel.”

  Her voice was more insistent and it finally got through.

  “What?” he asked distractedly.

  “I can’t hold this anymore.”

  “Shit. Sorry.”

  He leapt to his feet and quickly untied her arm. She gave a tiny groan of relief. He realised she’d been holding the pose f
or at least twenty minutes without a warm-up.

  “Hell, I’m sorry Isabella. I…”

  “It’s okay. I’m really out of practise. It’s been so long since I last posed.”

  “Let’s do some three minute ones after you’ve had a break and stretched. I’ll leave you to changed poses when you need to.”

  “Standing or lying?”

  “Um…can you stand but maybe have one leg on the couch?”

  Isabella walked around for a minute or two then raised her arms, stretching hard before adopting the pose, and Gabriel went back to his papers. Every few minutes she’d change the pose. It delighted Gabriel to see the ease of her movements. Without prompting she began to hold the rope as well, laying it across her body, wrapping it around both hands, using it on her ankles. No wonder she’d been such a great model.

  “Can you sit with arms outstretched? Legs apart as if both wrists and ankles are tied either side.”

  This time she held the pose for at least fifteen minutes. Gabriel moved his stool closer so he could concentrate on her muscles where they stretched out. They tried some other positions and by the end of a few hours he had some great ideas.

  “Isabella, can you just sit? You can put your wrap on. I want to get a number of different facial expressions. I’m not exactly sure how I want the painting to look yet.”

  She stood and picked up the robe, casually sliding her arms through the sleeves and drawing it closed with the sash, hiding her beautiful body from his view. Sitting back down on the couch, she waited for his directions, curling her legs underneath her.

  “I want you to imagine you’re resigned.”

  Her face was beautiful, so expressive. He asked for various emotions and got them from her without hesitation. That was, until he asked for shame.

  “I’d really like you to imagine you’re ashamed of something but wanting it at the same time. You know, maybe even a little frightened yet overall desiring.”

  Gone was the professional mask. Instead the look on her face made Gabriel want to wrap his arms around her and never let her go. He wanted to tell her he’d protect her from whatever it was that scared her. He wanted to tell her he’d look after her forever.

  She said in a panicked voice, “I can’t do that.”

  “You’re doing it. Well, you were. Just relax.”

  He kept sketching as a myriad of expressions flashed across her face. Somehow he’d innocently triggered something and now she fought within herself to contain whatever memory or experience he’d made her recall. He cursed himself inwardly as he drew. There was no doubt about it. There was the shame—so evident, and here was the longing. He almost gasped aloud as he saw the two combine then her face fill with such fear—more like absolute terror.

  Casually he said, “Maybe we’ll leave things for today. I’ve got a lot to work on. I want to try and decide which pose I like the best. I’ve got three canvases ready so I’ll be working three different ones until I decide.”

  Gabriel knew he was talking just to give Isabella time to compose herself. She finally stood and walked back into the tiny dressing room. Gabriel ran a hand through his hair, pulling it free from the bun he usually wore while he worked.

  Shit. What the fuck happened to her?

  He scratched his head and stood. Putting his drawings in a pile, he walked over to the blank canvas set on his easel. He heard her come up behind him and turned around to face her.

  “Thanks for today, Isabella.”

  “It wasn’t too bad.” She gave him a gentle smile.

  “I’ve got your case and sketchbook over on that table.” He pointed across the room.

  “Thank you.”

  “Want to see Ferdinand?”

  “May I?”

  “Of course. I meant what I said. You can come any time you like. I’ll introduce you now.”

  Together they walked outside after she’d collected her art gear. Going to her car, she pulled out her camera bag after throwing her tote and the art stuff on the seat.

  “Wait here a moment.” He disappeared inside the house then came back out with a couple of carrots. “He likes these.”

  They wandered down the walkway and Gabriel could see Ferdinand standing in the middle of the field eating grass. He whistled loudly then gave a call and the bull looked up then slowly walked toward them.

  Grinning at Isabella, he said, “He likes to make me wait.”

  “I can see that.”

  Isabella picked up her camera. As the bull got closer she began taking photos but when he reached the fence she stepped back warily.

  “It’s okay, for a bull he’s pretty gentle, a real sook. I’ve had him since he was thirteen months old so he’s been here two years and tame.”

  “How long will he live?”

  “Maybe till he’s fifteen. I’ve got a girlfriend coming for him. She’ll be here in a couple of months after going through quarantine.”

  Gabriel had been giving the bull pieces of carrot while they spoke.

  “Do you want some photos of him side-on or only head first?”

  “No, I need side ones, too. I want to see how the muscles play. I need the morillo.”

  “Ah, you know the lingo.”

  She gave him a grin as she said, “Found out on Google when I was trying to see if I could use any old bull.”

  She took more photos, this time close up and then Gabriel dropped the carrot inside the fence, making the bull move to stand sideways. Isabella was able to get a lot of photos.

  “So why do you want a Spanish bull?”

  Isabella suddenly looked embarrassed. Gabriel jumped in quickly.

  “Look, it doesn’t matter. You don’t have to tell me.”

  “It’s just for a model.”

  “A model? Is that what you use the clay for?”

  She blushed as she said, “Yes.”

  “Well, if you like I’ll leave you so you can get some work done without me watching. Maybe you could call in before you go so I know Ferdinand didn’t eat you.”

  She gave him a worried glance then looked at the bull.

  “It’s okay. He’s very gentle.” He laughed. “He wouldn’t hurt you.”

  With that he walked away. This woman was an enigma and he wished he could know her better. She had such strength. She’d stood up to him when they first met and in her studio. But then there were the hidden sides, the very vulnerable woman as well as the passionate one. She intrigued him. The more he was around her, the more he wanted to know her.

  Chapter Nine

  Isabella had no idea why she agreed to work with Gabriel. She could have said no and never seen him again. She knew she should have told him to get lost and flown to Spain, she could have got all the sketches and photographs of bulls she needed so why the hell did she agree?

  Deep down she knew but she was terrified to admit it. Frightened to face the truth.

  She wanted him, wanted him in that shameful way. Wanted him in that dark sexual way and it scared her to death. She’d half a mind not to go over this morning but in the end her craving to see him won out.

  It had actually turned out good.

  It was a relief to be able to act professional around him. She hadn’t been sure she would be able to. Gabriel had been true to his promise and kept the whole morning on an artist-model footing. He’d even taken her to see Ferdinand.

  Yesterday seemed like a nightmare and yet when Gabriel had come into the house, she’d willingly sunk into his arms and let him comfort her. She’d felt safe and protected as she fought her own personal hell. With his arms around her Isabella had felt as if she could face anything. He’d made her coffee and that’s when she’d blurted out that she’d pose for him. Where on earth had that come from?

  It took all her strength this morning to let him tie her arm. Images flashed into her head. Images of her tied with Gabriel poised above her. Images of him ordering her to do things. Things she’d never done, like oral sex. Things she didn’t dare whisper eve
n in her mind. All those hidden things like anal sex, getting tied up and being smacked and forcefully taken, being hurt.

  Somehow she managed to push them all away and become professional. She saw him become totally absorbed in his work. He no longer saw her as Isabella, she had become Issie the model. But then he’d started drawing her face.

  The terror she felt when he’d asked her to portray shame and desire as one. It felt as if he’d stripped her soul and bared her depravity to the world.

  How she managed to get through the morning surprised her. She’d drawn on reserves she didn’t realise she had and in a way she felt very proud of herself. Completely exhausted and mentally drained, Isabella arrived home and threw herself onto her bed. She didn’t even have the strength to undress, instead she just lay. Over and over in her mind she played out the last two days, torturing herself. She went over each scene, each conversation, and each thing that happened.

  “Damn, this is crazy. I can’t keep dwelling on this.”

  Isabella sat up, shaking herself mentally and physically. She couldn’t change what had happened but she could damn well make sure it never happened again, even though it was what she wanted more than anything in the world. When she’d called in to tell him she was going home he’d asked her if she would come and pose again on Wednesday, the day after tomorrow and she’d agreed then wondered again why she had.

  When the phone rang she was surprised to hear Ian’s worried voice on the end.

  “Hello, Isabella, it’s Ian. I just rang to make sure you’re okay.”

  Confused, she asked, “Why wouldn’t I be?”

  “I know what happened. I’ve already reamed Gabe out.”

  Isabella felt humiliated. Bad enough that she and Gabriel knew what happened but to know he’d told Ian… She didn’t know what to say.

  “He told me he acted like a caveman and I’m really sorry.” Maybe he didn’t know everything. Maybe Gabriel had just told him the bare facts. She hoped so. “He’s pretty stupid sometimes, Isabella, but he has a heart of gold.”

  “Well, things were okay today.”

  Isabella gave a sigh of relief. It seemed Ian didn’t know most of what had happened and wasn’t privy to the way she’d reacted.